[Vision2020] TRUMP ACCUSES BUTTIGIEG OF SUSPICIOUS TRAVEL TO AFGHANISTAN (SATIRE)
Tom Hansen
thansen at moscow.com
Wed Feb 5 10:06:39 PST 2020
Courtesy of the New Yorker at:
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trump-accuses-buttigieg-of-suspicious-travel-to-afghanistan
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TRUMP ACCUSES BUTTIGIEG OF SUSPICIOUS TRAVEL TO AFGHANISTAN
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In the aftermath of Pete Buttigieg’s strong showing in the Iowa caucuses, Donald J. Trump accused the former South Bend, Indiana, mayor of engaging in “suspicious travel” to Afghanistan.
“People are saying that he went to Afghanistan for seven months in 2014,” Trump told the hosts of “Fox & Friends” in a phone call. “Seven months is a long time to be running around in a Muslim country full of terrorists, don’t you think?”
He added that Buttigieg reportedly had a gun with him while he was in Afghanistan, a fact that Trump said “sounds fishy to me.”
“Let’s see, you fly all the way to a Muslim country full of all of these terrorists who need guns, and you’re bringing a gun into a country like that?” Trump said. “Who was he planning to give that gun to?”
“I don’t know if he was part of some caliphate or just helping them out, but we ought to find out,” he said. “I have a call in to the President of Afghanistan.”
Trump said that his suspicions about Buttigieg’s “totally unexplained travel to Afghanistan” spiked when he saw a photo of the former mayor “dressed up in some kind of weird camouflage suit.”
“You have to see this picture—he’s all dressed up in camo or whatever, like he’s ready for some kind of battle,” Trump said. “You’ll never find a picture of me dressed like that.”
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Seeya 'round town, Moscow, because . . .
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Tom Hansen
Moscow, Idaho
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