[Vision2020] Fw: dumb and dumber

[Sue Hovey]

Some of you will appreciate this, some of you won't.  That's ok.  He'd fit right in with some of our past gov. candidates, but let's not transplant him to Idaho with any ideas of making him our own. 

Sue Hovey
----- Original Message ----- 
From: William Frye 
To: undisclosed recipients: 
Sent: Saturday, May 23, 2009 10:54 PM
Subject: dumb and dumber







        from a friend - he said it reminded him a little of Molly Ivens - I agree



        Mule Diddlers of the World - Unite!


        by Jaime O'Neill | May 16, 2009 - 10:52am 

        There's a guy running to become Governor of Georgia who says he'd sacrifice his livin' breathin' son to help end abortion. There was a time when the irony in that gubernatorial candidate's position might be a mite obvious, but given how dadgum dumb we've gotten as a nation after eight years with the village idiot as our leader, chances are lots of people in Georgia and throughout the land might miss the collision of thought that occurs when people are almost eager to whack an existing kid in order to spare one not yet born.

        That guy seeking the gubernatorial office down in Georgia is a true believer named Neal Horsley, a would-be poster boy for some future public service ad trying to convince the public of the need for more mental health treatment facilities in the deep south.

        Horsley can be found among that brand of Bible beaters who get real bloody minded when the subject of a woman's right to choose comes up, and he's more than willing to do a homicidal number on people who don't agree with him. On his website, he publishes the names of abortion doctors and the addresses of abortion clinics, along with appeals to his fellow zealots to stop further terminations of pregnancies by any means necessary.

        Horsley got his start as a nut job back in his red dirt days as a boy in Georgia, where he admits gaining his first carnal knowledge with mules. "When you grow up on a farm in Georgia, your first girlfriend is a mule," Horsley said in an interview on Fox News."

        In yet another of those closeted ironies, Mr. Horsley's is running for office on the idea that gay marriage is an offense against God.

        Some unspecified time after his youthful mule-boy love affairs, Mr. Horsley got religion and, it is assumed, found other more species-appropriate objects of his desire.

        We've had some fairly odd governors get elected in this country as part of the ongoing attempt by the voters to discredit the very notion of democracy. There was that wrestler feller up in Minnesota, and a couple of actors in Californ-I-A. And then there's Sarah Palin up in Alaska, and the slick and handsome dimbulb down in Texas who wants to secede from the union so he can become president of his own damn country.

        Which is what this guy Horsley, the mule fornicator, wants to do because he figures that his best hope for living in a peckerwood heaven on earth is to secede from a nation ruled by laws like Roe v. Wade, and form a righteous nation where men can lord it over women the way Horsley, God, and the Taliban intended.

        Stranger things have happened in Georgia. Older readers might remember Lester Maddox, the guy who became governor of that state after his appetite-whetting stint as a restaurateur who became nationally famous for handing out ax handles to white patrons of his establishment who were encouraged to employ such farm implements in the interest of Negro-free dining environments.

        If you were this guy Horsley's kid, you might be getting a tad nervous about now, fretting over how far dear ol' dad might be willing to take this crusade for Christ and the unborn. 

        And you'd be none too reassured by what your Pop said in a recent interview, quoting the Bible in favor of the kind of family values that place one's family pretty far down the chute, survival-wise. When a reporter repeated the question about Horsley's willingness to sacrifice his son, the would-be Gov replied by citing scripture: "Unless you love me more than you love your father, your son, your wife, your daughter, you're not fit to be my disciple," Horsley said. "That's why there's a real rift of estrangement in my family,"

        It appears Horsley's family is a tad peck-ish when it comes to his ideas about showing devotion to Christ with their blood, but the mule-ish balking of his kin hasn't inclined Mr. Horsley to lighten up on the idea of sacrificing any or all of them to a greater good. 

        "I contend this is really about people's ability to believe in God. When it comes to that place, when you're talking about God's plan to protect Himself, then the lives of people become, really, almost irrelevant... in the degree that they result in Him being glorified."

        It remains unclear if Horsley's son will be supporting his dad's run for office. Calls to "Dobbins Horsley" were greeted by a recorded message that said, simply, "hee haw."



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