[Vision2020] Pizza Anyone?

[rvrcowboy]

I just thought this was cute and maybe some of you will enjoy it...

Dick

ORDERING PIZZA IN 2010

   (This is so close to what will be happening in 2010 that I'm not sure how

  Funny it really is... )

  Operator: Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your national ID
Number?

  Customer: Hi, I'd like to place an order.

  Operator: I must have your NIDN first, sir.

  Customer: My National ID Number, yeah, hold on, he, it's

  6102049998-45-54610.

  Operator: Thank you, Mr. Smith. I see you live at 42 Meadowland Drive, and

  The phone number is 494-2366. Your work number is 745 2302 and your mobile

  Number is 266-2566. Email address is smith at home.net 
<mailto:smith at home.net> . Which number are you
  Calling from sir?

  Customer: I'm at home. Where did you get all this information?

  Operator: We're wired into the HSS, sir.

  Customer: The HSS, what's that?

  Operator: We're wired into the Homeland Security System, sir. This will
  Add Only 15 seconds to your ordering time.

  Customer: (sighs) Oh well, I'd like to order a couple of your All-Meat
  Special pizzas.

  Operator: I don't think that's a good idea, sir.

  Customer: What d'ya mean?

   Operator: Your medical records and toilet sensors indicate that you've got

  Very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol. Medicare won't

  Allow such an unhealthy choice.

  Customer: What?! What do you recommend, then?

  Operator: You might try our low-fat Soybean Pizza. I'm sure you'll like
  it.

   Customer: What makes you think I'd like something like that?

   Operator: Well, you borrowed 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your local

  Library last week, sir. That's why I made the suggestion.

 

  Customer: All right, all right. Give me two family-sized ones, then.

 

  Operator: That should be plenty for you, your wife and your four kids.

  Your

  2 dogs can finish the crusts, sir. Your total is $29.99.

 

  Customer: I'll give you my credit card number.

 

  Operator: I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash. Your

  Credit card balance is over its limit.

 

  Customer: Well, I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your

  Driver gets here!

   Operator: That won't work either, sir. Your cheque account is overdrawn Also.

   Customer: Never mind! Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash ready. How

  Long will it take?

   Operator: We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45 minutes.

  If

  You're in a hurry you might want to pick them up while you're out getting

  The cash, but then, carrying pizzas on a motorcycle can be a bit awkward.

   Customer: Wait! How do you know I ride a bike?

   Operator: It says here you're in arrears on your car payments, so your car Got repossessed. But your bike's paid for and you just filled the tank
  Yesterday.

   Customer: Well, I'll be a #%#^^&$%^$@#

  Operator: I'd advise watching your language, sir. You've already got a

  July 4, 2005 conviction for swearing at a copper and another one, I see here, in September. For contempt at your hearing..swearing at the judge. Oh yes, And I see here that you just got out from a 3 month stretch in jail. Is this Your first pizza since your return to society?
 
  Customer: (speechless)

   Operator: Will there be anything else, sir?

  Customer: Yes, I have a coupon for a free 2 litre Coke.

 Operator: I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us from Offering free soft drinks to diabetics. The law now prohibits it. Thank You For calling Pizza Hut.
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