[Vision2020] Pigs, hogs, boars and bores

[Art Deco]

Very shy, indirect, afraid-to-offend Joan writes:

"That's too bad, but all is not lost.  Perhaps some day a lovely spider
named Charlotte will take up residence in the corner of your bedroom and
write the word "Humble" in her web.  You will read this and take it to
heart.  Then we will no longer be bored/boared/boored unto death by your
endless empty annoying squeals."

Perhaps, the word "Humble" should be programmed into a machine like the one 
in "In the Penal Colony" by Franz Kafka.  Then Donovan could be induced to 
learn that lesson the way prisoners learned to understand the message given 
them through the machine.


Art Deco (Wayne A. Fox)
deco at moscow.com


----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Joan Opyr" <joanopyr at moscow.com>
To: <vision2020 at moscow.com>
Sent: Friday, August 04, 2006 11:53 AM
Subject: [Vision2020] Pigs, hogs, boars and bores


> Donovan, you're a pig.  You're a list hog.  You are boorish and thus both
> a boar and a bore.  There now: are you satisfied?  Area Man has not called
> you a swine.  I have.  This, Arnold Ziffel, is an ad hominem attack.  I
> back it up with no arguments whatsoever; I simply invite people to read or
> re-read your 20 per day of illiterate, irrational, irritating squeals
> dating back, I believe, to the Battle of the Somme.  Brave readers may
> draw their own conclusions as to when exactly you met and annoyed the
> great swine-making goddess Circe.  I would suggest that this happened at
> the time of your birth, so either you were secretly pushed out in on an
> island in Greece or Circe came to Moscow in the early 1970s.  I'm plumping
> for the latter as it would explain more than just your own boarish/boorish
> behavior.
>
> You are an oik and an oink, Donovan Arnold.  On the Internet, as in life,
> this world is all about root hog or die.  You're rooting, all right, but
> you're not rootin' tootin', and I'm not rooting for you, nor yet am I
> playing the tiny violin at your endless pity party.  Why not?  Because you
> can't teach a pig to sing or to dance.  You can't put lipstick on a pig,
> and you can't make a silk's purse out of a sow's ear.  No matter how you
> slice it -- thick cut, center cut, or cured in maple syrup -- you will
> never be appropriately dressed for your very own swinish soiree.
>
> That's too bad, but all is not lost.  Perhaps some day a lovely spider
> named Charlotte will take up residence in the corner of your bedroom and
> write the word "Humble" in her web.  You will read this and take it to
> heart.  Then we will no longer be bored/boared/boored unto death by your
> endless empty annoying squeals.
>
> Until then, however, this Templeton the Rat isn't holding her breath.
>
> Joan
>
> Joan Opyr/Auntie Establishment
> www.joanopyr.com
>
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