[Vision2020] Help for our own Pee Wee Herman

[Joan Opyr]

Dear Regional Enquirer:

I took your advice about refilling my prescriptions, and the effect has been 
so salutary that I've decided to share my scrips with other Vision 2020 
readers:

1) All email programs have a block sender feature, AKA a Bozo filter.  With 
his big red nose, large clumsy feet, and mouth like the clown horn on a 
Shrine Circus car, it's clear to me that Mr. Enquirer would be happier if he 
were repatriated to the land of his birth, Internet Palookaville.  I'm sure 
Edna Wilmington will be there ready to greet him with a pie in the face, a 
steady supply of banana peels, and that old moron favorite, the joy buzzer.

2) This prescription is for Mr. Enquirer himself.  You are not writing; you 
are typing.  The former requires thought; the latter requires fingers.  As 
you seem to have trouble grasping this distinction, I suggest that you try 
the following exercise -- put both hands on the keyboard.  Now type.  Use 
the space bar and the shift key.  Feel the blood leaving your lower abdomen 
and rushing up to your head.  Isn't that nice?  No doubt you will miss the 
tender ministrations of Old Mother Palmer and her five lovely daughters, 
stroking your ego while you type one-handed, but I think we can agree that 
it's never a good idea to let Mr. Onan do our thinking for us.  He just 
doesn't have the resources.

This does, however, suggest another use for Edna's joy buzzer . . .

Joan Opyr/Auntie Establishment

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