[Vision2020] Teenagers Packing Heat Stir Second Thoughts On Amendment

[Tom Hansen]

Remember the Spokesman Review's Article "Armed With a Library Card and a
Glock?

http://mailman.fsr.com/pipermail/vision2020/2007-June/044970.html

Here is Doug Clark's (Editor, Spokesman Review) take on the Doty boys.

>From today's (June 5, 2007) Spokesman Review -

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Teenagers packing heat stir second thoughts on amendment 
Doug Clark
June 5, 2007

The right to bear arms is one of America's most sacred rights, except when
dopey teenagers start parading around with loaded weapons, which is why I've
scratched Post Falls off my summer travel plans.

I'm not sure Zach and Stephen Doty were what our forefathers had in mind
when they came up with the Second Amendment.

Zach began elevating the Post Falls community blood pressure last month
after he turned 18. He strapped a loaded 9 mm Glock 19 handgun to his hip
and started wearing it as a fashion accessory on trips to the library,
parks, stores and even to Bible studies.

 
Not wanting to miss out on a chance for public contempt, 15-year-old Stephen
recently joined big bro by slinging a loaded Ruger .22-caliber rifle over a
shoulder.

Disturbing though this may seem, it is all perfectly legal.

(Column note: I learned about North Idaho's Bullet Brothers thanks to the
fascinating story that appeared in the Post Falls-Rathdrum edition of Your
Voice. When the editors realized that not enough readers had been scared
spitless, they decided to publish it again in the Sunday Spokesman-Review.
That proved so successful that we will start rerunning all 5,490 of our Jim
West scandal stories, beginning Thursday.)

Teenagers are like proctologists. They often poke and prod to the great
discomfort of others.

It's a shame, however, that the Dotys can't just act out like normal jerky
teens.

You know, like going way over on their cell phone minutes or getting their
nipples pierced or having rock band logos tattooed on their hindquarters.

>From the story I gathered that the Doty boys are polite and wholesome
home-schooled zealots. They believe their gun toting actually helps society
by deterring crime and reminding citizens about our freedoms and the value
of investing in a Kevlar vest.

"An armed society is a polite society," offered Zach in the story.

That is so true.

I know if I bumped into Zach or Stephen I'd be way less sarcastic than
usual.

"Hi, Zach. Anything you need, Zach? Can I get you something, Stephen? How
about a soda? Or my watch? Really, I don't need it. Please, take it.

"Crying? No, I'm not crying. Why would I be crying?"

This is not to imply that the Dotys are up to anything sinister, like
plotting a takeover of Post Falls.

Don't be ridiculous. Who'd want it?

Don't go pegging me as an anti-gun sissy, either.

The minute we're invaded by, say, Canada, I'll be right there on the front
line dropping those Canuck bastards like clay pigeons.

I believe that keeping a handgun in your bedroom night table is a good idea,
too. Yessir. Nothing will scare away an intruder faster than blowing your
foot off.

You know, I think I'm most uneasy hearing that Zach has been hauling his
nine into church and Bible studies.

Bringing a live weapon into a biblically charged atmosphere is just asking
for trouble. I've seen God-fearing Christians go practically postal while
debating what constitutes a theologically correct mode of baptism.

(I favor total immersion, by the way. In wine.)

If the Bullet Brothers were more mature they'd understand that having the
right to do something doesn't necessarily make it right to actually do it.

For example: I could walk around downtown wearing nothing but a Speedo if I
wanted. But I care too much about people with heart conditions to exercise
this constitutional right to bare my charms.

With the summer tourist season at hand, Post Falls Mayor Clay Larkin has
weighed in on the issue with a spot-on impression of that mayor in the
classic movie "Jaws."

"I'm confident that our public is safe at this point in time," said Larkin
in the story.

I'm sure you're right, mayor. Teenagers packing heat into the library? What
possibly could go wrong?

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Seeya round town, Moscow.

Tom Hansen
Moscow, Idaho

"We're a town of about 23,000 with 10,000 college students. The college
students are not very active in local elections (thank goodness!)."

- Dale Courtney (March 28, 2007)