[Vision2020] HER VIEW: Time to apply common sense to solutions

[Saundra Lund]

For those who've not seen today's Daily News:

HER VIEW: Time to apply common sense to solutions
By Lenna Harding
Thursday, December 14, 2006 - Page Updated at 10:43:30 AM

Family values - my, what buzz words those have become. The recent
announcement of Vice President Dick Cheney's gay daughter's pregnancy has
stirred up new controversy on the whole subject of family values, gay
marriage, birth control and abortion. Certain groups argue a family consists
of a father, mother, and children - that the purpose of marriage is solely
for procreation. So much of the rhetoric on these subjects makes little
sense to me, and I have big problems with their arguments. Worse yet, they
attempt to enact these purely religious views into law. 

Meddling in the private lives of consenting adults is not the role of
government or anyone else. Nor is it government's role to legislate sexual
morality. Of course, we need to protect children from sexual predators and,
of course, we need to prosecute rapists and child pornographers. This is a
given. Leave consenting adults alone. I also have a big quarrel with those
who equate homosexuals with pedophiles. They are not the same thing. 

On a similar subject, if procreation is a requisite for marriage, what about
all those infertile and childless couples or those who marry long after
their childbearing years have passed? Are their marriages less valid because
they can't bear children? When people say a child needs a father and mother
in the home, why are they so willing to send fathers and mothers off to war
or into dangerous jobs where they are likely to be killed? This position is
a slap in the face of all single parents who are in that situation, not by
choice, but by circumstance. 

In a world where the total population is fast multiplying beyond the ability
of the earth to sustain itself, to encourage the production of lots of
children makes no sense. India and China recognized this and have taken
active steps to slow the birth rates in their countries. India offers free
sterilization. China enforces the one-child policy with forced abortions. I
hope we never reach the point where the China solution has to be implemented
in America, but it could happen. I'd rather population control continue as a
voluntary matter for as long as possible with responsible adults choosing to
limit their families. 

Why are so many against birth control? It makes no sense. In the formative
days of the Christian religion, the Earth's population was much smaller.
Humanity's hold on life was much more fragile. Many children were needed to
do the work and look after the elderly because so many died young. If the
church was to survive, it had to encourage more births. Times have changed
and it is time the church leadership recognizes this and adapts. To ban the
use of condoms in the face of the AIDS epidemic is irresponsible. 

We point to underdeveloped countries and their rapidly increasing
populations. It has been shown that the single most effective means of
limiting family size and improving health is educating women. Why aren't we
doing more toward that goal? 

The idea that gay marriage undermines the institution of marriage strikes me
as odd and totally irrelevant. Experience has shown that the single most
frequent cause of marriage breakup is poverty. This being true, why are
these same people who are so concerned about the sanctity of marriage not
directing their time, energy and resources toward dealing with poverty? 

As for gay marriage, I would much rather see these people in stable, long
lasting relationships whatever they are called. For society, this would be
much healthier in many respects - physical and mental health. Rather than
discouraging them, we should at least be enabling. Today, so many people are
lonely. More and more people without families are creating their own with
communal arrangements. The same laws that would enable gays to have the same
privileges as married people such as hospital visitation rights, and medical
leave to care for a partner and the like, also should apply to these other
arrangements. Whether these relationships are sexual or platonic is
irrelevant and none of anyone else's business. These arrangements should be
legally contractual as is civil marriage with the same means of dissolution.
No one suggests the churches have to accept this among their membership. 

I think it is high time to apply good old common sense to these matters. It
is long overdue. I've raised many questions here and have suggested what I
think might be some answers. We all need to open our minds to creative
solutions and be willing to accept new ideas. 


Lenna Harding grew up in Pullman, spending the first 20 years and past 30
years there. She is a longtime member of League of Women Voters and serves
on the board of the Gladish Community and Cultural Center.