[Vision2020] The Nicene Creed (was Atwood letter rewritten)

Joan Opyr joanopyr at moscow.com
Tue Apr 4 15:02:58 PDT 2006

Donovan accuses:

> I don't have to speculate it is personal. Just ask  them. Joan, Rose, 
> and her entire household & friends will just tell  you flat out they 
> are bigoted against conservative Christians and have  a personal ax to 
> grind with Wilson.

On the contrary, Donovan, you do speculate, and you speculate 
incorrectly.  I've never actually met Doug Wilson.  Melynda has; so has 
Rose.  But not me.  I sat next to him once in Applebee's, but I don't 
think sharing dining and drinking space with someone counts as knowing 
them.  If it does, then I also know the Ramones -- or, rather, I knew 
the Ramones.  All but one of them are now deceased.

My issue is not with conservative Christianity.  I don't give a damned 
about Reformed Christian Theology, either.  I think John Calvin was 
demonstrably an ill-tempered, narrow-minded bastard, but he's been dead 
for a long, long time.  There's not much point in fighting with Calvin; 
my arms are too short to box with ghosts.  As I have said time and time 
again, I don't give a tinker's cuss, a monkey's butt, or a plug nickel 
what Doug Wilson believes.  I care about his political agenda and his 
detrimental effect on the City of Moscow -- on our secular government 
and on our downtown businesses.  In other words, Donovan, I'm not 
interested in arguing theology with Doug -- that's his game, not mine.  
I'm interested in politics.  I'm interested in Doug's willingness to 
shamelessly play the persecution card in order to cover up his blatant, 
consistent disregard for the law.  This is not about Doug Wilson qua 
Doug Wilson; this is about a business masquerading as a church, 
claiming tax exemptions to which it is not legally entitled, and 
violating zoning law and city ordinance.

Why do you not understand this?  Because you don't want to understand.  
This scenario doesn't fit in with your own dreams of persecution, your 
own belief that you are "an endangered species."  Endangered species?  
Bah!  George W. Bush long ago delisted so-called moderates.  You're 
either with us or against us, remember?  You're on your own, moderate 
man, along with the Spotted Owl, the Snail Darter, and the Sawtooth 
wolves.  Better get used to it.

Now, let me try once again (because I'm a fool) to make one thing 
perfectly clear: my wife, Melynda, is a conservative Christian.  She is 
also a lesbian.  There is no disconnect here, as you yourself should 
know full well.  As Keely has explained, the term "conservative 
Christian" refers to theology, not politics.  Melynda holds to the 
Nicene Creed.  Rather than give it to you in Latin or Greek or even the 
version from the Book of Common Prayer, here's a contemporary 

We believe in one God, the Father, the Almighty,
maker of heaven and earth, of all that is seen and unseen.
We believe in one Lord, Jesus Christ,
the only Son of God, eternally begotten of the Father,
God from God, light from light, true God from true God,
begotten, not made, one in Being with the Father.
For us and for our salvation he came down from heaven,
by the power of the Holy Spirit he was born of the Virgin Mary and 
became truly human.
For our sake he was crucified under Pontius Pilate;
he suffered, died and was buried.
On the third day he rose again in fulfillment of the Scriptures;
he ascended into heaven and is seated at the right hand of the Father.
He will come again in glory to judge the living and the dead,
and his kingdom will have no end.
We believe in the Holy Spirit, the Lord, the giver of life,
who proceeds from the Father (and the Son)
Who with the Father and the Son is worshiped and glorified.
Who has spoken through the prophets.
We believe in one holy Catholic and apostolic Church.
We acknowledge one baptism for the forgiveness of sins.
We look for the resurrection of the dead, and the life of the world to 
come. Amen.

Melynda would, of course, use gender-neutral pronouns, and by Catholic, 
she means one communion within Jesus Christ.  (If you understand and 
actually make an effort to process the preceding, then I will buy you a 
Shirley Temple complete with an umbrella and a swizzle stick.  I'll 
leave a gift certificate for same at The Garden Lounge -- that is, if 
the bar survives the NSA parking situation.)

One more thing for you to ponder -- it is not I, nor Melynda, nor Rose 
who engage in imprecatory prayer.  That sin belongs solely to Doug 
Wilson and his followers.  They pray regularly for our deaths, for us 
to be struck down by God, to have our bones broken and our teeth 
smashed out, and all for defying them publicly and, dare I suggest, 
successfully.  Imprecatory prayer is a wicked, nasty, vile thing, 
Donovan, and you spend far too much of your good Christian time 
defending its unsavory practitioners.  Chew on that for awhile.

Joan Opyr/Auntie Establishment

PS: Now if by conservative Christian what you mean is simply "Donovan 
J. Arnold," then you're right; I have no conservative Christian 
friends.  I don't like you any more than you like me, and I expect 
we'll go on in this hostile fashion until the day we expire.  I can 
live with that (and happily, too).  But my definition of conservative 
Christian is considerably more expansive than yours (see the Nicene 
Creed again, for reference), and thus I count my conservative Christian 
friends by the score.  I'm lucky to have them; their friendship binds 
and sustains me, and I am grateful to them for their wit, their wisdom, 
and their faith.  They are fine people who deserve far better than the 
narrow representation given by you, Doug Wilson, and other shameless 
self-aggrandizers.  Jesus Wept.

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