[Vision2020] Wireless Manners

[Michael Curley]

Yes, particularly in airline terminals where for some reason certain  
folks seem to want to shout into their cell phones.  The best defense 
is to just move away when possible, but often it isn't.  I do try the 
icy stare or first, the imploring/pleading look.  When those don't 
work, I "draw" my own cell phone--perfect that here in the West where 
guns were once worn on the hip, we now wear cell phones...and i 
either place a real or imagined call to someone to whom i say in a 
very loud voice--SPEAK UP, THERE'S SOMEONE SHOUTING INTO HIS CELL 
PHONE HERE, AND I CAN'T HEAR YOU.  this usually does the trick and 
draws a few smiles from others who have been trying to ignore the 
shouter.  

If that the doesn't work, final move is to go stand/sit next to the 
person  and continue speaking very loudly into my cell phone.  Most 
will move, but those who don't are at least as inconvenienced as the 
rest of us.

Maybe a more neighborly and less offensive way would be to pull out a 
sheet of paper and draw:  BUY A BETTER CELL PHONE, THEN YOU WON'T 
HAVE TO YELL AS IF YOU'RE ON TIN CANS AND A STRING, but that would 
assume the person isn't so self-absorbed that s/he would actually 
read it.

Mike


On 18 Oct 2005 at 18:39, Art Deco wrote:

Yes, and stop signs and stop lights too.

W.
    ----- Original Message ----- 
From: Avix Magister 
To: Art Deco 
Sent: Tuesday, October 18, 2005 5:31 PM
Subject: Re: [Vision2020] Wireless Manners



On 10/18/05, Art Deco <deco at moscow.com> wrote: 
    All,

Below is a short discussion from CNN about wireless manners. Have 
any other V 2020 readers had similar expereinces? Any suggestions 
for handling the most intrusive ones?

Art Deco (Wayne A. Fox)
deco at moscow.com


can we get this to apply to turn signals as well? 



    Where are your wireless manners?
    As public unplugs, rudeness seems to be getting worse
    By Amy Cox
    CNN
    Tuesday, October 18, 2005; Posted: 10:58 a.m. EDT (14:58 GMT) 
(CNN) -- The only thing advancing quicker than wireless innovation 
may be the rudeness of the people using the technology, experts say.
"The more gadgets there are, the worse things seem to get. People get 
really wrapped up in their little technological world, and they 
forget that there are other people out there," said Honore Ervin, co-
author of "The Etiquette Grrls: Things You Need to Be Told." "Just 
because it's there at your disposal, doesn't mean you have to use it 
24/7."
A recent poll by market research company Synovate showed that 70 
percent of 1,000 respondents observed manner-less technology use in 
others at least on a daily basis.
About the same percentage saw the poorest etiquette in cell phone 
users over other devices. The worst habit? Loud phone conversations 
in public places, or "cell yell," according to 72 percent of the 
Americans polled.
This world without wires allows technology to ride shotgun throughout 
daily life, which, for the most part, is a convenient and useful 
tool. But it's the lack of a politeness protocol that has some up in 
arms.
"Cell phones obviously are the big, big thing. People use them 
anywhere and everywhere," Ervin said. "At the movies -- turn off your 
cell phone. I don't want to pay $10 to be sitting next to some guy 
chitchatting to his girlfriend on his cell phone."
She also cites the growing complaints by her readers and friends of 
cell phone use at events such as church services, funerals or school 
graduations, "and that's just wrong," she said.
This rudeness has deteriorated public spaces, according to Lew 
Friedland, a communications professor at the University of Wisconsin-
Madison. He calls the lack of manners a kind of unconscious rudeness, 
as many people are not aware of what they're doing or the others 
around them.
"I think it's really noticeable in any plane, train or bus where 
you're essentially subjected against your will to someone else's 
conversation," he said. "You can listen to intimate details of their 
uncle's illness, relationship problems with their lovers, their 
breakups and what they're having for dinner.
"It takes what was a public common space and starts to parcel it out 
and divide it up into small private space."
On his frequent bus rides from Madison to Milwaukee over the years, 
Friedland said he's watched the arc of cell phone use and rudeness in 
an informal, but telling, experiment. A short time ago, if cell phone 
users were politely asked to talk quietly, they would comply with 
chagrin, he said.
"Now I'm finding more and more people are essentially treating you 
like it's your problem, like you don't understand that loud cell 
phone use is normal in public."
But it's not just phones. As Wi-Fi continues to grow in public 
places, the rules of etiquette for use are up for debate.
"In general, Wi-Fi is terrific ... but what is troublesome is when 
people use it in cafes or coffee shops, and they just camp out there 
forever," Ervin said. "They're doing their taxes there. They'll put 
together three tables so they'll have room to spread out. That's just 
not right.
"If you go to someplace like that, you stay there 20 minutes and then 
leave. It's not your living room. Public places are not to be 
abused."
And typing on a BlackBerry or other PDAs to stay connected is fine, 
but just don't use them while talking to someone else, Ervin said. 
"It makes people feel insignificant."
'Like swatting mosquitoes'
But what's the proper etiquette for dealing with cell phone faux pas 
or people who've shunned you for their BlackBerry?
A low-tech solution is what Ervin calls the "Etiquette Grrls' Icy 
Glare," a shooting daggers-evil eye combo.
"It reminds people of school librarians and mean teachers," she said. 
"If that doesn't work, turn around and say very quietly, 'Do you 
mind?' I think most people are not going to be mean about it because 
they just don't realize what they're doing."
As more people reach their boiling points for bad wireless manners, 
Ervin said she believes society will shift toward less tolerance for 
inconsiderate behavior and less reasons for the "Icy Glare."
"Once the majority of people begin to get annoyed at this sort of 
thing, there are going to be rules in places like at cafes for a 20-
minute limit for using your computer and that sort of thing."
Friedland agrees that people have to set the rules but debates 
whether it will ever happen. "You can pass legislation about talking 
on cell phones in public, but it's virtually unenforceable," he said.
He also said the public has yet to reach its limit for tolerating 
cell phone abuse. He sees people more or less resigned to it.
"It's like swatting at mosquitoes essentially," he said. "You can get 
one or two, but if there's a swarm of them around you, you just kind 
of give up or get out of the way. I think cell phones' use in public 
spaces is partly having the same kind of effect."
But Ervin said she has faith that courtesy will prevail over bad 
wireless manners.
"I don't like to be too cynical," she said. "Maybe I'm wrong, but I 
hope not."


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