[Vision2020] The Brother Carl Experience!

Joan Opyr auntiestablishment at hotmail.com
Thu Feb 3 12:20:02 PST 2005


Scott asks (quite rightly):

"Ms. Opyr! If your objective was to make the bile rise
to the edge of my throat -- Mission Accomplished!  
Only the ladies can send love letters to Carl?"


Of course anyone may address a love letter to Carl -- the more props amour he receives, the better.  But unless you are of the female persuasion, Carl is unlikely to take an adequately reciprocal romantic interest.  Despite his near constant watching of "SpongeBob," the "Teletubbies," "Bugs Bunny" and "Will and Grace," Carl remains stuck in his heterosexual hell.  On the Kinsey scale, Carl is a one, and there's nothing any of us can do to shift that meter up a notch.  Here's the thing, Scott: CARL LIKES WOMEN!  He can't help it; he was born that way.  He likes women so much that he thinks they're equal to if not quite possibly better than men.  Women smell good.  Women look nice.  Carl likes their hair, their figures, the way they walk, talk, and their (general) lack of an Adam's apple and an itchy beard.

Tolerance means accepting Carl as he is.  It means -- even if we don't approve -- that we recognize his right to pursue his own happiness as he sees fit.  As the Wiccans say, "An it hurt no one, so mote it be."  Or, as my grandfather said, "Do what you damn well please, and tell the rest of the world to kiss old Rosa."

Joan Opyr/Auntie Establishment
www.auntie-establishment.com

PS: I should probably point out that I, too, only answer love letters from women.  Alas, Carl and I are not equal opportunity egomaniacs.  We're strictly single-sex.  Sorry, boys.    Get more from the Web.  FREE MSN Explorer download : http://explorer.msn.com
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