[Vision2020] Good Old Climate

[Joan Opyr]

In honor of Nate's request that visionaries NOT condemn vandalism, I offer 
instead some satiric abuse . . .

The Mysterious Case of the NSA Christmas Lights
By Carolyn Much-Too-Keene

Chapter One

"Jeepers!" cried Nancy Drew, hopping down from her well-worn bar stool.  "Is 
that a menacing shadow lurking in front of the New St. Andrews?"

Her fellow bar-flies smiled indulgently as the titian-haired detective sped 
across The Garden Lounge, her patent leather clutch in one hand and a sky 
blue cocktail in the other.  Gosh, they marveled, even when tipsy that Nancy 
sure cut a striking figure.  The splash of Blue Curacao in her yummy vodka 
drink perfectly complemented her pale chiffon sheath and dyed-to-match 
pumps, and, despite the fact that she'd been propping up the bar for nearly 
three hours, her charming coiffure was only slightly mussed.

"Golly!" Nancy mused.  "It's a good thing I took Auntie Establishment's 
course in how to run with a drink in your hand.  It's sure come in handy!"

Waving goodbye to her favorite mixologist, Nancy exited the bar.  Once 
outside, she kicked off her pumps and began to creep silently across 
Friendship Square.  Hiding behind the kiddie slide, Nancy watched the 
menacing shadow she'd spotted from the lounge resolve itself into two, and 
then three, and then four separate figures.

"Gosh," she pondered.  "I wonder if this is a gang of liberal, progressive, 
secular, homosexual, humorless, feminist Confederate-bashers come to harass 
our local theocrats?  Or is it just a bunch of silly drunks?"

Reaching into the bottom of her always carefully stocked purse, Nancy pulled 
out her third-generation night vision goggles, a birthday gift for her sweet 
sixteen from her special friends in the Special Forces.  Suddenly, the sound 
of a thousand tiny light bulbs being violently wrenched from their moorings 
floated through the icy air.  With trembling hands, the intrepid sleuth 
adjusted the focus on her goggles.

"Why," she gasped, "judging from the logos printed on their one-hundred 
percent cotton sweatshirts, it looks as if these vandals attend a 
fully-accredited government school!  Good thing I packed my knuckledusters 
and mace!"


To Be Continued . . .

Joan Opyr/Auntie Establishment
Also a fan of the Hardy Boys

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Rethink your business approach for the new year with the helpful tips here. 
http://special.msn.com/bcentral/prep04.armx