[Vision2020] Intersting stuff part two

[Art Deco aka W. Fox]

Shakespeare:  First, we'll kill all the lawyers.

W.

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Pat Kraut" <pkraut@moscow.com>
To: "vision2020" <vision2020@moscow.com>
Sent: Wednesday, April 07, 2004 10:32 PM
Subject: [Vision2020] Intersting stuff part two


| As I said, the jurys, lawyers and courts are really at fault.
| PK
|
|
| Stella Awards....lawsuits...CRAZY
| >
| >It's once again time to review the winners of the annual Stella awards.
| >
| >The Stella's are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled coffee
| >on herself and successfully sued McDonalds.  That case inspired the Stella
| >Awards for the most frivolous successful lawsuits in the United  States.
| >
| >Unfortunately the most recent lawsuit implicating McDonalds, the teens who
| >allege that eating at McDonalds has made them fat, was filed after the 2002
| >award voting was closed.
| >
| >This suit will top the 2003 awards list without question.
| >
| >
| >5th place (Tied)
| >
| >Kathleen Robertson of Austin Texas was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her
| >peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running
| >inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably
| >surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving toddler was Ms.
| >Robertson's Son.
| >
| >
| >5th place (Tied)
| >
| >19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical expenses
| >when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman
| >apparently did not notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when
| >he was trying to steal the hubcaps.
| >
| >
| >5th place (Tied)
| >
| >Terrence Dickson of Bristol Pennsylvania was leaving a house he had  just
| >finished robbing by way of the garage door.  He was not able to get the
| >garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was malfunctioning.
| >He could not reenter the house because the door connecting the house and
| >garage locked when he pulled it shut.  The family was on vacation and Mr.
| >Dickson found himself locked in the garage for 8 days.  He subsisted on a
| >case of Pepsi he found and a large bag of dry dog food.  He sued the
| >homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental
| >anguish.  The Jury agreed to the tune of $500,000.
| >
| >
| >4th Place
| >
| >Jerry Williams of Little Rock Arkansas was awarded $14,500 and medical
| >expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbor's
| >Beagle dog.  The Beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard.  The
| >award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been a
| >little provoked at the time as Mr. Williams, who had climbed over the fence
| >into the yard, was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.
| >
| >
| >3rd place
| >
| >A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster
| >Pennsylvania $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink and broke her
| >coccyx (tailbone).  The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had
| >thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.
| >
| >
| >2nd Place
| >
| >Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware sued the owner of a nightclub in a
| >neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and
| >knocked out two of her front teeth.  This occurred whilst Ms. Walton was
| >trying to crawl in through the window of the Ladies Room to avoid paying
| >the $3.50 cover charge.  She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.
| >
| >
| >1st Place
| >
| >This year's runaway winner was Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City,
| >Oklahoma.  Mr. Grazinski purchased a new Winnebago motorhome.  On his trip
| >home from an OU football game, having driven onto the freeway, he set the
| >cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the drivers seat to go into  the
| >back and make himself a cup of coffee.  Not surprisingly, the RV left the
| >freeway, crashed and overturned.  Mr. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not
| >advising him in the owner's manual that he could not actually do this.
| >
| >The jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new Winnebago Motor Home.  The
| >company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this suit just in
| >case there were any other complete morons buying their recreation vehicles.
|
|
|
|
|
|
| "When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long
| at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us."
| Helen Keller
|
|
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