[Vision2020] Hello, flock!

[Joan Opyr]

Welcome to the Church of Auntie Establishment!  Though I am not a licensed 
counselor, a trained therapist, or a qualified theologian, I have just 
applied for instant Internet ordination through the Universal Life Church, 
http://www.ulc.net/.  I have downloaded my pastoral certificate (suitable 
for framing) to my Hewlett Packard Deskjet 952C, and just as soon as it 
finishes printing, I will be open for business.

Weddings, funerals, marital advice . . . my ordination is legal in all fifty 
states.  What’s my dogma?  What’s my creed?  What do I believe?  From the 
ULC web-site:

“Every person has the natural right (and the responsibility) to peacefully 
determine what is right.  We are advocates of religious freedom.”

That’s it.

To celebrate my ordination, I would like to invite you all to an informal 
secular assembly – a Humanist Hootnanny – at the Coeur d’Alene Brewing 
Company on Thursday, December 11th, from 7pm until enlightenment.  I will 
not be asking questions, I will not be answering questions, and I will 
certainly not be handing out pamphlets.  I’ll be drinking beer, laughing at 
my own jokes, and listening to the juke box.  You’re welcome to join me . . 
. and if Carl Westberg comes, I’ll buy him a pint!  (He is indeed the nicest 
liberal in Moscow.  In fact, he's just a good guy all around.)

Yours truly,

The Right Revved Joan Opyr

PS: Don't bother to RSVP.  This isn't an organized gathering . . . it's 
anti-establishment, of course.

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