<html><head><meta http-equiv="content-type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"></head><body dir="auto">Courtesy of the New Yorker at:<div><br></div><div><a href="https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/mypillow-customer-finds-classified-documents-inside-duvet?utm_source=nl&utm_brand=tny&utm_mailing=TNY_Borowitz_021022&utm_campaign=aud-dev&utm_medium=email&bxid=5bea112b3f92a40469640747&cndid=24494982&hasha=fcf5f751d983fab314fe7ded63633933&hashb=6018563f5ade416eb6bc5de029040538e8428a87&hashc=5b2de1b62cf02ee03360af7fdb18f191bd4d6e9c5ea1abaf4247b3b6d1a52533&esrc=article-newsletter&utm_term=TNY_Borowitz">https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/mypillow-customer-finds-classified-documents-inside-duvet?utm_source=nl&utm_brand=tny&utm_mailing=TNY_Borowitz_021022&utm_campaign=aud-dev&utm_medium=email&bxid=5bea112b3f92a40469640747&cndid=24494982&hasha=fcf5f751d983fab314fe7ded63633933&hashb=6018563f5ade416eb6bc5de029040538e8428a87&hashc=5b2de1b62cf02ee03360af7fdb18f191bd4d6e9c5ea1abaf4247b3b6d1a52533&esrc=article-newsletter&utm_term=TNY_Borowitz</a></div><div><br></div><div>—————————————————</div><div><h1 data-testid="ContentHeaderHed" class="BaseWrap-sc-TURhJ BaseText-fFzBQt ContentHeaderHed-kpvpFG eTiIvU fHXNkq klOfMA" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 44.20000076293945px; margin: 20px 0px 0px; --type-token: consumptionEditorial.hed-standard; font-family: IrvinHeadingWeb, "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-feature-settings: normal; line-break: auto; line-height: 1.130090495492055em; font-weight: 400; overflow-wrap: normal; transition-property: color, background, text-shadow; transition-duration: 0.2s; transition-timing-function: ease-in-out; cursor: unset; grid-column-start: 1; grid-column-end: span 8; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">MyPillow Customer Finds Classified Documents Inside Duvet</h1></div><div><br></div><div><p style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-top: 0in;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">AKRON, OHIO (<a href="http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report" data-uri="ad590b1f995f8441e559e6d657f7d00b" style="color: rgb(149, 79, 114); box-sizing: border-box; cursor: pointer; --color__token-name: colors.interactive.base.light; transition: color 200ms ease; line-height: inherit; text-decoration-line: underline;"><span style="color: black;">The Borowitz Report</span></a>)—In a remarkable discovery, a customer who purchased a MyPillow duvet found it stuffed with classified documents from the desk of Donald J. Trump.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="paywall" style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; box-sizing: border-box; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Carol Foyler, who lives in Akron, Ohio, said that, after she accidentally tore open the duvet, a trove of shredded documents came spilling out.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="paywall" style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">After she began taping together the documents, she found several relating to national defense, including an order from Trump to send a birthday cake to the North Korean leader, Kim Jong Un.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="paywall" style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; box-sizing: border-box; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Foyler said that, once she finishes reconstituting the documents, she will send them to the National Archives in Washington for safekeeping.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="paywall" style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; box-sizing: border-box; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">“Obviously, it’s not ideal to find classified documents inside a random duvet, but so far I haven’t seen the nuclear codes,” she said.</span></p></div><div>—————————————————<br><br><div dir="ltr"><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Seeya 'round town, Moscow, because . . .</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><br></span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">"Moscow Cares" (the most fun you can have with your pants on)</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">http://www.MoscowCares.net</span></div><div><br></div><div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Tom Hansen</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Moscow, Idaho</span></div></div><div><br></div><div>“A stranger is just a friend you haven’t met.”</div><div>- Roy E. Stolworthy</div><div></div></div></div></body></html>