<html><head><meta http-equiv="content-type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"></head><body dir="auto"><div>Couryesy of the New Yorker at:</div><div><br></div><div><a href="https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trump-claims-he-won-german-election?utm_source=nl&utm_brand=tny&utm_mailing=TNY_Borowitz_092721&utm_campaign=aud-dev&utm_medium=email&bxid=5bea112b3f92a40469640747&cndid=24494982&hasha=fcf5f751d983fab314fe7ded63633933&hashb=6018563f5ade416eb6bc5de029040538e8428a87&hashc=5b2de1b62cf02ee03360af7fdb18f191bd4d6e9c5ea1abaf4247b3b6d1a52533&esrc=article-newsletter&utm_term=TNY_Borowitz">https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trump-claims-he-won-german-election?utm_source=nl&utm_brand=tny&utm_mailing=TNY_Borowitz_092721&utm_campaign=aud-dev&utm_medium=email&bxid=5bea112b3f92a40469640747&cndid=24494982&hasha=fcf5f751d983fab314fe7ded63633933&hashb=6018563f5ade416eb6bc5de029040538e8428a87&hashc=5b2de1b62cf02ee03360af7fdb18f191bd4d6e9c5ea1abaf4247b3b6d1a52533&esrc=article-newsletter&utm_term=TNY_Borowitz</a></div><div><br></div><div>—————————————————</div><div><h1 class="content-header__row content-header__hed" data-testid="ContentHeaderHed" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 44.2px; margin: 20px 0px 0px; grid-column-start: 1; grid-column-end: span 8; --type-token-name: consumptionEditorial.hed-standard; line-height: 1.13009em; font-family: IrvinHeadingWeb, "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-weight: 400; font-feature-settings: normal; line-break: auto; overflow-wrap: normal; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">Trump Claims He Won German Election</h1></div><div><br></div><div><p style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-top: 0in;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">PALM BEACH (<a href="https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report" style="color: rgb(149, 79, 114); box-sizing: border-box; cursor: pointer; transition: color 200ms ease; line-height: inherit;"><span style="color: black;">The Borowitz Report</span></a>)—Urging the German people to “stop the steal,” Donald J. Trump claimed that he was elected Chancellor of Germany over the weekend.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="paywall" style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; box-sizing: border-box; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Trump said that, once the official vote tallies have been recounted, it will be clear that he won the German election by a “landslide.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="paywall" style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Reflecting on his purported win, Trump said, “I’ve always wanted to be the Chancellor of Germany. That’s a title that’s been held by some very fine people.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="paywall" style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; box-sizing: border-box; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">He revealed that he planned to send the former mayor of New York Rudy Giuliani to Germany to contest the election results. “He hasn’t been disbarred there yet,” Trump said.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="paywall" style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; box-sizing: border-box; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"><span style="font-size: 14pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">For his part, Giuliani said that he relished his latest mission on Trump’s behalf. “I can’t wait to get to Germany,” he said. “When does Oktoberfest start?”</span></p></div>—————————————————<br><br><div dir="ltr"><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Seeya 'round town, Moscow, because . . .</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><br></span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">"Moscow Cares" (the most fun you can have with your pants on)</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">http://www.MoscowCares.net</span></div><div><br></div><div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Tom Hansen</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Moscow, Idaho</span></div></div><div><br></div><div>“A stranger is just a friend you haven’t met.”</div><div>- Roy E. Stolworthy</div><div></div></div></body></html>