<html><head><meta http-equiv="content-type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"></head><body dir="auto">Courtesy of the <i>New Yorker</i> at:<div><br></div><div><a href="https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trump-sues-the-coronavirus-for-treating-him-unfairly">https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trump-sues-the-coronavirus-for-treating-him-unfairly</a></div><div><br></div><div>———————————————</div><div><h1 class="content-header__row content-header__hed" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 44.2px; margin: 20px 0px 0px; grid-column-start: 1; grid-column-end: span 8; line-height: 1.13009em; font-family: IrvinHeadingWeb, "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-weight: 400; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">Trump Sues the Coronavirus for Treating Him Unfairly</h1></div><div><br></div><div><p style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-top: 0in;"><span style="font-size: 16pt;">WASHINGTON (<a href="https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report" style="color: rgb(149, 79, 114); box-sizing: border-box; cursor: pointer; transition: color 0.2s ease; line-height: inherit;"><span style="color: black;">The Borowitz Report</span></a>)—Alleging that it “has treated me very unfairly,”<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span><span style="color: black; box-sizing: border-box; cursor: pointer; transition: color 0.2s ease; line-height: inherit;"><a href="https://www.newyorker.com/tag/donald-trump" style="color: rgb(149, 79, 114); box-sizing: border-box; cursor: pointer; transition: color 0.2s ease; line-height: inherit;">Donald J. Trump</a> an</span>nounced on Friday that he is suing the coronavirus.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; box-sizing: border-box; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"><span style="font-size: 16pt;">“This is a very nasty virus, and by that I mean it has been nasty to me personally,” Trump told reporters. “I never thought that there could be anything more terrible than Jim Acosta, but the coronavirus is like an invisible Jim Acosta.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; box-sizing: border-box; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"><span style="font-size: 16pt;">Offering a preview of his lawsuit, Trump said that he was accusing the coronavirus of meddling in the 2020 election.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; box-sizing: border-box; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"><span style="font-size: 16pt;">“You look at the numbers and, every time the virus’s numbers go up, my numbers go down,” he said. “This virus is trying to rig the election for Sleepy Joe.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;"><span style="font-size: 16pt;">Trump said that he was prepared to take his case against the coronavirus all the way to the Supreme Court, claiming, “My case is so perfect, even those ungrateful beauties Kavanaugh and Gorsuch will side with me.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; box-sizing: border-box; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"><span style="font-size: 16pt;">Relations between Trump and the virus have reportedly grown so strained that he no longer allows discussions of the coronavirus at meetings of the Coronavirus Task Force.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; box-sizing: border-box; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"><span style="font-size: 16pt;">At the White House, the press secretary, Kayleigh McEnany, said that Trump felt “deeply betrayed” by the coronavirus.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="margin-right: 0in; margin-left: 0in; font-size: medium; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; box-sizing: border-box; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"><span style="font-size: 16pt;">“<em style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: inherit; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-caps: small-caps; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-position: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; text-transform: lowercase;"><span style="font-style: normal;">covid</span></em>-19 would not be what it is today without President Trump,” she said.</span></p></div><div>———————————————<br><br><div dir="ltr"><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Seeya 'round town, Moscow, because . . .</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><br></span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">"Moscow Cares" (the most fun you can have with your pants on)</span></div><div><a href="http://www.moscowcares.com/" style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><font color="#000000">http://www.TomandRodna.com/MoscowCares</font></a></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"> </span></div><div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Tom Hansen</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Moscow, Idaho</span></div></div><div>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:14.0pt;font-family:"Arial",sans-serif">“A
stranger is just a friend you haven't met.” - Roy E. Stolworthy</span></p></div><div></div></div></div></body></html>