<html><head><meta http-equiv="content-type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"></head><body dir="auto">Courtesy of <i>The Onion</i> at:<div><br></div><div><a href="https://politics.theonion.com/82-year-old-new-jersey-congressman-bill-pascrell-quietl-1836417927">https://politics.theonion.com/82-year-old-new-jersey-congressman-bill-pascrell-quietl-1836417927</a><br><div><br></div><div>———————————————</div><div><br></div><div><h1 class="headline hover-highlight entry-title js_entry-title" style="box-sizing: inherit; margin: 0px 0px 1rem; font-family: ElizabethSerif, Georgia, serif; line-height: 1.3; font-size: 34px; text-rendering: optimizeLegibility; padding: 0px; word-break: break-word; -webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;"><a href="https://politics.theonion.com/82-year-old-new-jersey-congressman-bill-pascrell-quietl-1836417927" data-id="" style="box-sizing: inherit; color: rgb(0, 0, 0); text-decoration: none; line-height: inherit;">82-Year-Old New Jersey Congressman Bill Pascrell Quietly Asks Ilhan Omar If He Can Be Part Of The Squad</a></h1></div><div><br></div><div>WASHINGTON—Sheepishly approaching the representative after a morning hearing on U.S. livestock and poultry economies, 82-year-old New Jersey congressman Bill Pascrell quietly asked Rep. Ilhan Omar Tuesday if he could be part of her squad. “Excuse me, Ms. Omar, but I’ve been paying a good deal of attention to this so-called ‘squad’ of yours and can’t help but think that I might make an exciting addition to join in on the fun,” said the Paterson-based octogenarian, smiling broadly and nodding his head as he noted that he maintained a strong presence on social media and could furnish several hearty recommendations from colleagues if it would help with any decisions on his prospective squad membership. “I can help with any tweeting you ladies might need. Heck, we might even talk to the other gals and make some sort of viral video together. But enough about me: What do you think? Am I squad material?” At press time, Pascrell could be heard exclaiming, “Oh, gosh, never mind then,” and rushing off after Omar began explaining the platforms her group represents.</div><div><br></div><div>———————————————<br><br><div dir="ltr"><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Seeya 'round town, Moscow, because . . .</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><br></span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">"Moscow Cares" (the most fun you can have with your pants on)</span></div><div><a href="http://www.moscowcares.com/" style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><font color="#000000">http://www.MoscowCares.com</font></a></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"> </span></div><div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Tom Hansen</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Moscow, Idaho</span></div></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><br></span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">“You’re a Mean One, Mr. Trump”</span></div><div><a href="http://www.tomandrodna.com/MoscowCares/Songs/Donald_Trump/Youre_a_Mean_One_Mr_Trump.mp3">http://www.tomandrodna.com/MoscowCares/Songs/Donald_Trump/Youre_a_Mean_One_Mr_Trump.mp3</a></div><div> </div><div><br></div></div></div></div></body></html>