<html><head><meta http-equiv="content-type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"></head><body dir="auto"><div>Courtesy of the <i>New Yorker</i> at:</div><div><br></div><div><a href="http://tinyurl.com/Cruz-Delivers-Concession" target="_blank" style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">http://tinyurl.com/Cruz-Delivers-Concession</a></div><div><br></div><div>---------------------------------</div><div><br></div><div><div><h1 class="title" itemprop="headline" style="border: 0px; margin: 5px 0px 2px; padding: 0px; -webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; text-rendering: geometricprecision; font-size: 38px; font-family: 'Irvin Heading', 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-weight: normal; text-transform: uppercase; line-height: 1.1; letter-spacing: -0.05rem;">CRUZ DELIVERS EARLY CONCESSION SPEECH FOR TRUMP</h1></div><div><br></div><div>HOUSTON (The Borowitz Report)—Saying that it was “time to let the healing begin,” Senator Ted Cruz conceded defeat on behalf of Donald Trump in the early afternoon of Election Day.</div><div><br></div><div>In conceding defeat for Trump, the Republican, from Texas, said that he was breaking with the tradition of waiting for election returns to come in because “it is in the best interest of this great nation of ours.”</div><div><br></div><div>With his wife, Heidi, at his side, Cruz said that, now that Trump had been defeated, it was time for the nation “to look to the future.”</div><div><br></div><div>“The United States faces many great challenges going forward,” he said. “God willing, we will find a Republican nominee in 2020 who is equal to those challenges.”</div><div><br></div><div>Cruz brushed aside reports that Trump had not yet conceded defeat and was still campaigning for the Presidency. “I understand why Donald might feel that he has to do that,” Cruz said. “But now, my fellow-Americans, let’s move forward.”</div><div><br></div><div>Cruz would not divulge for whom he voted earlier in the day. “I voted for the person I thought would be the best President,” Cruz said, adding that he cast a write-in vote.</div></div><div><br></div><div>---------------------------------<br><br><div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Seeya 'round town, Moscow, because . . .</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><br></span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">"Moscow Cares" (the most fun you can have with your pants on)</span></div><div><a href="http://www.moscowcares.com/" style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><font color="#000000">http://www.MoscowCares.com</font></a></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"> </span></div><div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Tom Hansen</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Moscow, Idaho</span></div></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><br></span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">"There's room at the top they are telling you still.</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">But first you must learn how to smile as you kill,</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">If you want to be like the folks on the hill."</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><br></span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">- John Lennon</span></div></div></div></body></html>