<html><head><meta http-equiv="content-type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"></head><body dir="auto"><div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;"><span></span></div><div><meta http-equiv="content-type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;"><span></span></div><div><meta http-equiv="content-type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;"><span></span></div><div><meta http-equiv="content-type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;"><span></span></div><div><meta http-equiv="content-type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"><div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;">. . . Two dynamically opposing faiths can live together happily ever after.</div><div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;"><br></div><div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;">Courtesy of today's (August 17, 2014) Spokesman-Review.</div><div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;"><br></div><div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;">-------------------------------------</div><div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;"> </div><div><h1 style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%; font-size: 28px; margin: 0px 0px 10px; clear: both; line-height: 1.2; color: rgb(17, 17, 17); font-family: Arial, sans-serif; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);">Marriage of two faiths</h1><h5 class="subhead" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%; font-weight: normal; margin: 0px 0px 12px; font-size: 16px; clear: both; line-height: 1; color: rgb(68, 68, 68); font-family: Arial, sans-serif; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);">Couple together for 27 years says differences bring them close</h5><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">BOISE – They’ve been married for 27 years. He says: “We’ve raised good children. We are good for each other.”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">At the same time, they have big differences. She grew up in a small town in Montana; he was born and raised in Pakistan. Music is her life; he can’t carry a tune. They joke: She makes the messes and he cleans them up.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">“She’s west and I’m east; she’s this way and I’m this way, completely opposite of each other.”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">But what could be considered the most polarizing issue – their faith – is actually what brings the Boise couple closest together. Lori Conlon Khan is a Christian and her husband, Ather Khan, is a Muslim.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Lori: “He said, ‘You are strong in your faith, and that’s important to me.’ ”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Faith is the foundation of their marriage. Theirs are beliefs that don’t require the other to convert or capitulate, but faiths that center around mutual respect, common ground and deep-rooted spirituality.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Ather: “I consider a fine line between Christianity and Islam in many ways.”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Theologically speaking, the sticking point is Christianity’s belief in Jesus as the son of God, as well as the concept of the Trinity. For Lori and Ather, the similarities outweigh the differences.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Ather: “I cannot be a good Muslim without believing in Jesus as the messenger of God, very respected messenger. Somebody asked Prophet Mohammed, (who said that he) will sit on one side of God, and Jesus will sit on the other side of God. That’s how important Jesus is considered in Islam.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">“And so is Prophet Moses – and all the prophets and the messengers that have come at different times to different places.”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">The Quran, the Bible and the Torah all share Old Testament roots, and the Quran has New Testament stories as well.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Lori: “(In the Quran), Mary gives birth under an olive tree, which is, I think, a beautiful story. When the people come to see that she has a baby and she isn’t married and that causes a big ruckus, Jesus, as a newborn infant, speaks to the people to say that this is my mother and she’s holy.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">“It’s basically the same story with just a different kind of lovely version.”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Islam is an Arabic word that means “submission to one God,” and Muslim means “people who submit to one God.” So what Lori and Ather focus on is the simple crux of faith.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Ather: “That you believe in God.”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Lori: “And live your life as well as you can.”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Ather: “So how can I come back and say, ‘Lori, you are wrong’?”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Lori has been an elementary school music teacher for 32 years, and Ather is a retired businessman specializing in international development. They met when Lori, early in her career, was waiting tables to make ends meet. Ather, visiting from Seattle, persistently asked for her phone number, and Lori, equally as determined, kept saying no.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Lori: “Then finally he said, ‘What do I have to do to get your phone number? I’m a gentleman, I come from a good family, I have a business degree.’ He kind of started to give me his pedigree.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">“I said, ‘Wait, wait, wait. This (waitressing) is not my life; this is not who I am.’ That’s when he said, ‘You’re a teacher, aren’t you?’ I was like, what? Is it stamped on my forehead? He said, ‘No, I just have a good sense about people.’ ”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">He was good looking and charming – plus he had an intriguing accent. She relented. Her family was aghast; his faith permits him to marry “people of the book” – the Quran, the Bible or the Torah. For him, the decision was easy.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Lori: “When I told (my grandmother) that I was marrying Ather and everybody was (coming unglued), she was very supportive and she said, ‘Your life with this man will be an adventure.’</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">“And it has been. It has been a very wonderful adventure. Not always easy, but …”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">“Life is not easy,” Ather said, finishing her sentence.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Like their faith, their marriage is also about finding common ground. Lori made a framed cross-stitch that says, “Love, honor and negotiate.” And when one is working at compromise, it’s easier to see issues from other points of view. In particular, the sharing of the faiths has made them sensitive to others’ misunderstandings.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Lori: “Sometimes people who don’t know better will say, ‘They pray to their Allah,’ as if Allah is a different God. It’s simply the Arabic word for God.”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Ather: “How do you say God in Spanish? Dios. How do you say God in French? Or in Hindi? If you say Allah in Arabic and you say God in English and you say Dios in Spanish or Bhagwan in (Sanskrit) it’s all the same, but we’re talking about it in our own language, different ways.”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">As Lori and Ather raised their three children (now in college or graduated from college and all in social service fields), faith was naturally a part of their upbringing.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Ather: “Because we are living in a Western culture, a Christian society, I wanted (our children) to know about Islam. I wanted them to understand what dad’s religion is.”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Lori: “I (also) had to really start reading the Bible and think about how I felt about things so I could answer questions the kids had. So it was really good for me to have to understand my faith more and where I stood on certain Christian ideas.”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">To both Lori and Ather, the most important part of their faith centers on peace.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Lori grew up during the Vietnam War with images of helicopters lifting dead and wounded seared in her memory. As a college student, she was part of a USO tour that sang and danced in veterans hospitals.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">“The young men I saw were still remnants of the Vietnam War, and that really shaped my ideas about nonviolence and peace.”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">And Ather’s influence strengthens the idea of peace in their house. It comes from his faith, too.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Ather: “The first thing in Islam, if I meet somebody or I enter a house, I say ‘Asalaam alaikum’ – ‘May peace be upon you.’ Peace is the greatest aspect. Before I say anything, how are you, I say ‘Asalaam.’ That is how important we consider peace.”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">“What better can we ask for somebody?”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Sept. 11 was a test for their family in many ways, as it was the epicenter of violence, hatred and misunderstanding that still festers in America.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Lori: “That made me even more intent on being what I can be to bring peace, however I can, into my classroom, into my family, my community at large.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">“(And so I want) to live an example – a Muslim and Christian, living together for 27 years and raising our families. It is possible.”</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">--------------------</span></p><p style="margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Lori and Ather Khan have been married for 27 years. What makes their marriage uncommon is that she’s a Christian and he’s Muslim.</span></p><p style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; margin-bottom: 21px; overflow: visible !important;"><img src="cid:5A066997-7ED3-4564-9FE9-259BA9997438" alt="rg17_Two_Faiths-One_Marriage_t1240.jpg" id="5A066997-7ED3-4564-9FE9-259BA9997438" width="640" height="855"></p></div><div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto;">-------------------------------------<br><br><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Seeya 'round town, Moscow, because . . .</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><br></span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">"Moscow Cares"</span></div><div><a href="http://www.moscowcares.com/" style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><font color="#000000">http://www.MoscowCares.com</font></a></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"> </span></div><div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Tom Hansen</span></div><div><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">Moscow, Idaho</span></div></div><div> </div></div></div></div></div></div></body></html>