<!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional//EN">
<HTML><HEAD><TITLE>FW: History 101</TITLE>
<META http-equiv=Content-Type content="text/html; charset=iso-8859-1">
<META content="MSHTML 6.00.6000.16414" name=GENERATOR>
<STYLE></STYLE>
</HEAD>
<BODY bgColor=#ffffff>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2>Dick, thank you so much for forwarding the truth
about evolution as it was influenced by beer. The resulting splitting of
the species into 2 subgroups, liberal, and conservatives, was interesting.
You may wish, in your studies, to peruse the comments of former Interior
Secretary James Watt. His investigations and experience led him to
conclude, along this line, that there are two kinds of people: liberals and
Americans.</FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2>The pursuit of truth continues. Keep sharing
your research with us Dr. Sherwin.</FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2>Dr. Tony Simpson</FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2>Sudznbubbls University</FONT></DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2></FONT> </DIV>
<BLOCKQUOTE dir=ltr
style="PADDING-RIGHT: 0px; PADDING-LEFT: 5px; MARGIN-LEFT: 5px; BORDER-LEFT: #000000 2px solid; MARGIN-RIGHT: 0px">
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial">----- Original Message ----- </DIV>
<DIV
style="BACKGROUND: #e4e4e4; FONT: 10pt arial; font-color: black"><B>From:</B>
<A title=rvrcowboy@clearwire.net href="mailto:rvrcowboy@clearwire.net">Dick
Sherwin</A> </DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"><B>To:</B> <A title=tonytime@clearwire.net
href="mailto:tonytime@clearwire.net">Tony Simpson</A> ; <A
title=revtom@firstpresgj.org href="mailto:revtom@firstpresgj.org">Tom
Hansen</A> ; <A title=susan_fagan@selinc.com
href="mailto:susan_fagan@selinc.com">Susan Fagan</A> ; <A
title=sscrln@wildblue.net href="mailto:sscrln@wildblue.net">Susan Carlin</A> ;
<A title=ancomiry@cableone.net href="mailto:ancomiry@cableone.net">Steph
Gossage</A> ; <A title=mcondrey@cableone.net
href="mailto:mcondrey@cableone.net">Marc Condrey</A> ; <A
title=Kittykat74u@aol.com
href="mailto:Kittykat74u@aol.com">Kittykat74u@aol.com</A> ; <A
title=Jesse.Dinnell@potlatchcorp.com
href="mailto:Jesse.Dinnell@potlatchcorp.com">Jesse Dinnell</A> ; <A
title=jlw290@msn.com href="mailto:jlw290@msn.com">Jennifer L Wolfe</A> ; <A
title=jampot@adelphia.net href="mailto:jampot@adelphia.net">g. crabtree</A> ;
<A title=dickf@dselectrical.com href="mailto:dickf@dselectrical.com">Dick
Flerchinger</A> ; <A title=dedawson@clearwater.net
href="mailto:dedawson@clearwater.net">Deanne</A> ; <A
title=burgessjunction@msn.com href="mailto:burgessjunction@msn.com">Dan &
Jo Burgess</A> ; <A title=dcarlin@lewiston.com
href="mailto:dcarlin@lewiston.com">D Carlin</A> ; <A
title=cindimader@moscow.com href="mailto:cindimader@moscow.com">Cindi
Mader</A> ; <A title=christyK@clearwire.net
href="mailto:christyK@clearwire.net">Christy</A> ; <A
title=alycesue@clearwire.net
href="mailto:alycesue@clearwire.net">Cherylene</A> ; <A
title=Bruce.Gebhart@potlatchcorp.com
href="mailto:Bruce.Gebhart@potlatchcorp.com">Bruce Gebhart</A> ; <A
title=rotella69@yahoo.com href="mailto:rotella69@yahoo.com">amber rotella</A>
</DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"><B>Sent:</B> Tuesday, March 20, 2007 6:29
PM</DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"><B>Subject:</B> History 101</DIV>
<DIV><BR></DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2></FONT> </DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial">
<DIV> </DIV></DIV>
<DIV><BR></DIV>
<DIV>Humans originally existed as members of small bands of
nomadic<BR>hunters/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains during the
summer and<BR>would go to the coast and live on fish and lobster in the
winter.<BR><BR>The two most important events in all of history were the
invention of beer<BR>and the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to
get man to the<BR>beer. These were the foundation of modern civilization and
together were the<BR>catalyst for the splitting of humanity into two distinct
subgroups:<BR><BR>1. Liberals; and<BR>2. Conservatives.<BR><BR>Once beer was
discovered, it required grain and that was the beginning of<BR>agriculture.
Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so<BR>while our
early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented,<BR>they just
stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed.<BR><BR>Some men
spent their days tracking and killing animals to B-B-Q at night<BR>while they
were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as<BR>the
Conservative movement.<BR><BR>Other men who were weaker and less skilled at
hunting learned to live off<BR>the conservatives by showing up for the nightly
B-B-Q's and doing the<BR>sewing, fetching, and hair dressing. This was the
beginning of the Liberal<BR>movement.<BR><BR>Some of these liberal men
eventually evolved into women. The rest became<BR>known as
girliemen.<BR><BR>Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the
domestication of cats, the<BR>invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the
concept of Democratic voting<BR>to decide how to divide the meat and beer that
conservatives provided.<BR><BR>Over the years conservatives came to be
symbolized by the largest, most<BR>powerful land animal on earth, the
elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the<BR>jackass.<BR><BR>Modern liberals
like imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer white<BR>wine or
imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well<BR>done.
Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare.<BR><BR>Another
interesting evolutionary side note: most of their women have
higher<BR>testosterone levels than their men. Most social workers, personal
injury<BR>attorneys, journalists, dreamers in Hollywood and group therapists
are<BR>liberals. Liberals invented the designated hitter rule because it
wasn't<BR>fair to make the pitcher also bat.<BR><BR>Conservatives drink
domestic beer. They eat red meat and still provide for<BR>their women.
Conservatives are big-game hunters, rodeo cowboys,
lumberjacks,<BR>construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, police
officers, corporate<BR>executives, athletes, Marines, and generally anyone who
works productively.<BR>Conservatives who own companies hire other
conservatives who want to work<BR>for a living.<BR><BR>Liberals produce little
or nothing. They like to govern the producers and<BR>decide what to do with
the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more<BR>enlightened than
Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in<BR>Europe when
conservatives were coming to America. They crept in after the<BR>Wild West was
tamed and created a business of trying to get more for<BR>nothing.<BR><BR>Here
ends today's lesson in world history: It should be noted that a Liberal<BR>may
have a momentary urge to angrily respond to the above before forwarding<BR>it.
A Conservative will simply laugh and be so convinced of the absolute<BR>truth
of this history that it will be forwarded immediately to other
true<BR>believers and to more liberals just to piss them
off.<BR><BR><BR><BR></DIV></BLOCKQUOTE></BODY></HTML>