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Joan,<br>
<br>
I'm pleased that you slept well last night. Allow me, if you will, to
make a recommendation. I used to be the volunteer Chairman of the
Board of Chicago's largest community mental health organizations (the
irony here is crushing - but I'll leave that for another day.) Often
we would be called in on emergency cases for those poor souls having
extreme psychotic episodes. Usually we would give them Halcion to
settle them down. As our Head of Medical Services used to say
"Halcion:
When you positively, absolutely, have to make the voices stop." My
guess it would even stop the freakish droning of Rush's voice. Good
idea?<br>
<br>
Excuse the pun, but introducing my daughter to <u>The Adventures of
Robin
Hood</u> is a capital idea. She's been inattentive lately while I have
been reading
her the Canterbury Tales in its original middle-english. I've been
worried about how I get past the whole dicey issue of the cuckholder
thing as well. You've
given me the perfect way out. I've got to say though, it seems reading
Chaucer to an eight year old is the prepubescent alternative to
halcion. Seems to work every time. I just don't get it.<br>
<br>
As for Robin Hood, the way I recall the story, Robin was compelled to
retrieve money
that had been taken by the tyrannical King through an unfair scheme of
taxing the peasants. Fair Hood was not "stealing from the rich and
giving to the poor" but providing a <b>significant tax rebate</b>.
Seems pretty libertarian to me. <br>
<br>
I am fascinated by your notion of "gateway literature" though. This
might lead to really dodgy stuff like Adam Smith's <u>The Wealth of
Nations</u>, or perhaps even (gasp!) Ayn Rand. What's next? I can see
it now, having to put my poor dear into a twelve-step program to
address her adrenaline addiction from reading post-modern economic
philosophy. As my jewish friends would say "Oy, what a shandre!"<br>
<br>
I wish I could take credit for the indecorous side of your personal
lexicon. Alas, I cannot. Your thinking I'm old enough (and I'll take
it as a complement) to have affected your language as a child probably
comes from my self-portrait as a barnacle-knotted hunchback (you know,
middle-aged). Although I wouldn't mind looking that way so much (hey,
there are worse alternatives) I'm more the human equivalent of a
nondescript American cheese sandwich - on Wonder bread - with mayo
(think of <i>those </i>the alternatives - chopped liver, pulled pork,
chicken with schmaltz, head cheese.) I have the kind of face that
people immanently forget. That's a blessing as far as I concerned.
Especially given MY personal lexicon and unabashed willing to use it.<br>
<br>
Tally-ho indeed,<br>
<br>
Dave "explitive-deleted" Budge <br>
<br>
ps. Thanks for the tip on late night ESPN, but I've just taken my
first I.V. dose of the bee venom and HGH. I'll let you know how it
works. I'm starting to get off just now and I'm beginning to look like
a Rush Limbaugh bobble-head doll. The horror... the horror.<br>
<br>
<br>
Joan Opyr wrote:<br>
<blockquote type="cite"
cite="midBAY10-DAV1922630C282A806F0A45E0C5760@phx.gbl">
<div>Dear Dave,</div>
<div> </div>
<div>I did sleep well last night, but then I was on drugs.
Hydrocodone, that is. Hillbilly heroin. Limbaugh tea. Ya'll come
back now, ya hear? (And, no, I didn't get my dope from Mr. Limbaugh's
housekeeper. My prescription is perfectly legal and my usage perfectly
valid. Anyone who read my post on the dead mouse in my Frosted
Flakes will know that I don't have a housekeeper -- Melynda's
protestations to the contrary.)</div>
<div> </div>
<div>I've been giving some thought, Dave, to your daughter's comment
re: the redistribution of wealth. "That's stealing!" While I
certainly wouldn't accuse you of indoctrinating that innocent young tot
with your libertarian thinking, have you ever considered exposing her
to some classic children's literature like, say, <strong>The
Adventures of Robin Hood</strong>? Then again, perhaps Robin Hood is a
kind of gateway drug; just as hydrocodone leads one to think of Mr.
Limbaugh (if not to think <strong>like</strong> Mr. Limbaugh), then
perhaps Robin Hood and his merry men lead straight to <strong>Das
Kapital</strong>? Oh, Friar Tuck, what hast thou wrought?</div>
<div> </div>
<div>BTW, I spent part of my childhood living in a small town just
outside of Detroit. I think it's quite possible, Dave, that your Lake
Michigan blue streak might have drifted across the lower peninsula and
settled on the banks of the Detroit River. Hence, my mother has you
to thank as well as my grandfather to blame for my colorful vocabulary.</div>
<div> </div>
<div>Tally-ho, my libertarian friend,</div>
<div>Joan Opyr/Auntie Establishment</div>
<div> </div>
<div>PS: Oh, sorry, Dave, but the ointment won't help. You'll
probably have to call the Bosley Clinic. If you don't know the number,
just sit up tonight watching ESPN until ten or eleven o'clock. The
Bosley Clinic's 1-800 number will flash across the screen at least a
dozen times. You'll also have a chance to jot down the number for
Enzyte should you by any chance be interested in other forms of natural
male enhancement. (I don't know where all you applied that depilatory
cream, <strong><u>and I don't want to know</u></strong>.) </div>
<div> </div>
<blockquote
style="border-left: 2px solid rgb(0, 0, 0); padding-right: 0px; padding-left: 5px; margin-left: 5px; margin-right: 0px;">
<div
style="font-family: Arial; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; font-size: 10pt; line-height: normal; font-stretch: normal; font-size-adjust: none;">-----
Original Message -----</div>
<div
style="background: rgb(228, 228, 228) none repeat scroll 0% 50%; -moz-background-clip: initial; -moz-background-inline-policy: initial; -moz-background-origin: initial; font-family: Arial; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; font-size: 10pt; line-height: normal; font-stretch: normal; font-size-adjust: none; color: black;"><b>From:</b>
David M. Budge</div>
<div
style="font-family: Arial; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; font-size: 10pt; line-height: normal; font-stretch: normal; font-size-adjust: none;"><b>Sent:</b>
Thursday, February 10, 2005 12:41 PM</div>
<div
style="font-family: Arial; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; font-size: 10pt; line-height: normal; font-stretch: normal; font-size-adjust: none;"><b>To:</b>
Joan Opyr</div>
<div
style="font-family: Arial; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; font-size: 10pt; line-height: normal; font-stretch: normal; font-size-adjust: none;"><b>Cc:</b>
Vision2020 Moscow</div>
<div
style="font-family: Arial; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; font-size: 10pt; line-height: normal; font-stretch: normal; font-size-adjust: none;"><b>Subject:</b>
Re: [Vision2020] Social Security Time Line</div>
<div> </div>
Joan, I'm hoping you slept well last night. I've been spending the day
daubing the soars from my overexposure to the extra-strength
depilatory. I'm researching ways to accelerate the generation of my
dermas and I think a combination of human growth hormone and
intravenous bee venom may do the trick. I'll keep you posted since you
were the impetus for my chemical self-flagellation.<br>
<br>
Anyhow, after years of living in Chicago I'm convinced about one thing
for sure. The speed in which I am able to traverse cross-town traffic
is directly proportional my red-faced, sputum splattering, invective
saturated road rage. It usually comforts me upon arrival to my
intended destination. Like the father in the movie A Christmas Story,
I'm sure that I have "spun a string of obscenities that still lingers
over Lake Michigan to this day." <br>
<br>
And yes, I kiss my mother with this mouth.<br>
<br>
Dave Budge<br>
</blockquote>
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