[Vision2020] I WON I WON I WON I WON!

[Tom Hansen]

I WON I WON I WON I WON!
(Poem about Donald Trump)

Author unknown

   

I won!  I won!  I won!  I won!

I’ll tweet it like a scream

And if I tweet it very loud

I’ll wake from this bad dream.



Remember, folks, not long ago?

My rallies proud and large?

The swarm of fans who risked their lives

So I could stay in charge?



They cheered me like a deity

No masks to block their cries

They clapped and roared and loved me

As I superspread my lies.



The fake news said I would not win —

They’re always, always wrong —

The only way that I could lose

Was if the count went wrong.



And when the early tally came

I really did quite well!

But then the votes for Joe rolled in —

As fraudulent as hell.



I bellowed: We must stop the count!

The count’s a giant scam!

I’m still the chosen president

I AM I AM I AM.



But still the count kept going

And it did not go my way

In Michigan, Wisconsin

Even down in red G-A.



The libs praised Stacey Abrams

And her leftist voter pack

No way I’d be defeated

By some women?! And they’re Black?!!



To prove that I’m the winner

And the leader of this land

I headed to my golf course

With my putter in my hand.



I rode there in my motorcade

Fans cheered me on my path

I wore my all-white MAGA hat

I tried to hide my wrath.



And when the networks called it —

When they said Joe Biden’s name —

I felt a chilling, red-hot rage

But kept on with my game.



Folks partied in the streets, I heard,

Some broke into a dance

They cheered for Joe in Germany

The church bells rang in France.



Libs cried “The emp’r has no clothes!”

Some sang, “The witch is dead!”

But I? I golfed on bravely

And I covered up my dread.



They honked their silly, lib’rl horns

But here’s what made me gag —

The sight of all those Democrats

Who waved our country’s flag.



Now Rudy and my lawyers

Figure out what we should do

There’s really just one answer —

It’s to sue and sue and sue.



Concession is for losers

And for those who don’t mind pain

For victims, wimps and Democrats

And guys like John McCain.



Sniff. Don’t get me started on Arizona.

.

Some say I’m throwing tantrums

That I’m just a bratty boy

A kid who’s starved for mommy’s love

So won’t give up his toy.



Some say I’m Putin’s puppet

In some giant Russian plot

To undermine democracy

I tell you I AM NOT!



But strongmen are my biggest fans —

Like Obrador and Xi —

They won’t acknowledge Biden yet —

Their bets are still on me.



We manly men love macho guys

And women love us too!

And what could be more manly

Than a good old-fashioned coup?



I think back on the past four years

By God it’s been a trip

I tore this land to shreds so fast

Like flimsy paper — rip!



I never was a leader

But I surely was The Boss

I turned your fears to hatred

Fed my ego with your loss.



And still I seed your minds with fear

I plant the rot of doubt

And if I tweet lies loud enough

I’ll never get kicked out.



The GOP still backs my play

They know I hold the ace:

They cross me and I’ll tweet it —

I’ll divorce them from my base.



Yet Sleepy Joe and Kamala

Now act like king and queen

They’re even takring credit

For my miracle vaccine!



I WON I WON I WON I DID!

You know what else is swell?

Inauguration Day is booked

At my D.C. hotel.



And if things go against me

Well, of course, I just might flee

Or maybe I can get a job

As host on “Jeopardy?”

—————————————————

Seeya 'round town, Moscow, because . . .

"Moscow Cares" (the most fun you can have with your pants on)
http://www.MoscowCares.net

Tom Hansen
Moscow, Idaho

“A stranger is just a friend you haven’t met.”
- Roy E. Stolworthy
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