[Vision2020] Trump Says Nation Will Have Vaccine Before It Sees His Taxes (SATIRE)

[Tom Hansen]

Courtesy of the New Yorker at:

https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trump-says-nation-will-have-vaccine-before-it-sees-his-taxes

———————————————
Trump Says Nation Will Have Vaccine Before It Sees His Taxes

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Making a solemn promise to the American people, Donald Trump vowed that the nation will have a coronavirus vaccine before it sees his tax returns.

“People are saying that it takes a long time to see a vaccine,” Trump said. “I say, not compared to how long it will take to see my taxes.”

Trump said that while there was a chance that Americans could have an effective coronavirus vaccine by the end of the year, the chance of their having a glimpse of his tax returns by then sits at zero. “Those are fantastic odds in favor of a vaccine,” he beamed.

To insure that the nation gets a vaccine before it gets his taxes, Trump said he was launching an ambitious initiative called Operation Infinite Delay, to slow the disclosure of his taxes to a dead halt.

“Eventually, my taxes will just go away,” he predicted.

At the National Institutes of Health, Anthony Fauci was asked for his assessment of Trump’s forecast that a vaccine would be released before his taxes. “This might be the first scientifically accurate thing he’s said,” Fauci commented.

———————————————

Seeya 'round town, Moscow, because . . .

"Moscow Cares" (the most fun you can have with your pants on)
http://www.TomandRodna.com/MoscowCares
  
Tom Hansen
Moscow, Idaho
“A stranger is just a friend you haven't met.” - Roy E. Stolworthy


-------------- next part --------------
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
URL: <http://mailman.fsr.com/pipermail/vision2020/attachments/20200517/29696e4c/attachment-0001.html>