[Vision2020] Mitch McConnell Wonders If He Could’ve Done More To Harm People In Private Sector (SATIRE)
thansen at moscow.com
Thu Aug 8 08:30:29 PDT 2019
Courtesy of The Onion at:
Mitch McConnell Wonders If He Could’ve Done More To Harm People In Private Sector
WASHINGTON—Reflecting on his 34-year career in Congress that led to his becoming the most powerful person in the Senate, Majority Leader Mitch McConnell reportedly noted Wednesday that he couldn’t help but wonder sometimes if he could’ve done more to harm people in the private sector. “Sure, I’ve been able to hurt a lot of everyday Americans during my time in the Senate carrying out the Republican Party’s destructive vision, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t sometimes ask myself whether I could’ve done more to increase suffering in this country if I’d worked as an oil lobbyist or mining sector CEO,” said McConnell, who admitted that he often lies awake at night pondering the lives he could’ve ruined if he hadn’t entered the public sector at such a young age. “Now, of course, I’m in a position where I can offer grave harm and ruin to tens of millions, if not hundreds of millions of people, but I think of the early years when I didn’t have as much power in Congress and imagine myself making more of a difference crippling the futures of people on a state or local level. I’m proud of using my public service to cause as much pain and suffering as possible, of course, but there’s a part that always gnaws at me, wondering whether I could’ve done more in a career as a defense sector executive or pharmaceutical tycoon. At the end of the day, I just hope I’ve done enough.” McConnell also said that he sometimes wondered what it would be like to work hard and become a self-made man rather than marrying into money.
Seeya 'round town, Moscow, because . . .
"Moscow Cares" (the most fun you can have with your pants on)
“You’re a Mean One, Mr. Trump”
-------------- next part --------------
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
More information about the Vision2020