[Vision2020] The Borowitz Report

[Art Deco]

September 13, 2012
Attacked on Foreign Policy, Romney Cites His Money’s Experience Abroad
Posted by Andy Borowitz<http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/bios/andy_borowitz/search?contributorName=Andy%20Borowitz>

[image: romney-borowitz-libya.jpg]

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report <http://bit.ly/NhEEu0>)—One day after he was
roundly criticized by both parties for his comments about Libya, Republican
Presidential nominee Mitt Romney attempted to burnish his foreign-policy
credentials today, telling reporters that “no one has spent more time
overseas than my money has.”

“My money has served in banks from Switzerland to Bermuda, and from Bermuda
to the Cayman Islands,” Mr. Romney said. “I challenge my opponent’s money
to equal that record of service.”

Doubling down on his latest theme, Mr. Romney promised that “on Day One of
my Presidency, I will ensure that American money is safe and secure in
secret vaults and underground caves around the world.”

Mr. Romney’s recent foray into foreign policy may have hurt him in a new
poll, in which a majority of likely voters agreed with the statement, “Mitt
Romney is starting to make his trip to the London Olympics look like the
pinnacle of modern diplomacy.”

An official statement from the Romney campaign did not refer to his latest
comments, but indicated that between now and the election Mr. Romney’s
schedule would deëmphasize events where he might be called upon to open his
mouth.


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Art Deco (Wayne A. Fox)
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