[Vision2020] Ahmadinejad Wins Stanley Cup

[Carl Westberg]

>From the Borowitz Report:  

                        In what many are
describing as an upset victory of unprecedented proportions, Iranian
president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad defeated the Pittsburgh Penguins last
night to win the 2009 Stanley Cup, Iran's Interior Ministry announced
today.


According to the ministry, which Mr. Ahmadinejad runs, the
Iranian hard-liner defeated the Penguins by a score of 6-0, scoring two
hat tricks in the victory.


But Penguins star Evgeni Malkin immediately disputed Mr.
Ahmadinejad's claim, arguing that the Iranian president did not even
appear in the game.


Mr. Ahmadinejad scoffed at Mr. Malkin's charge, stating, "He's just pissed that I was named MVP."


The Iranian president took time out from celebrating his Stanley
Cup win to announce that he had just been named Poet Laureate of
England.

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