[Vision2020] When is it and when is it not my business?

[Sunil Ramalingam]

Doug,

I think people's personal lives don't involve me, unless those people choose 
to involve me in them in some way.  So Nick's personal life is none of my 
business, and I'm mystified by your repeated attempts to make an issue out 
of it on this listserve.  Now if Nick were to discuss his personal life 
here, then of course he'd be opening the issue up.  But he hasn't, and 
you're way out of line with the way you keep bringing it up, in my opinion.

Go ahead and bicker with him -or anyone else here - over the issues he 
raises, but until you're invited, you should stay out of his bedroom.  I'm 
willing to assume the invite is neither forthcoming nor likely to be 
accepted, so it seems to me the issue should be closed.

Someone's ex-husband is none of my business unless the person involved 
chooses to raise it here.  Until then it stays their business.  Nothing 
mystical about that line.

Your family life is your business, and I don't intend to raise it here 
unless you bring it up somehow; then I think I should stick to the issue you 
raise.  If you're discussing where to take your kid to gymnastics, I'd be an 
ass to start discussing how you should discipline your kid.

Your licensing status is none of my business.  If you do some work for me 
and falsely hold yourself out in some way, then it's my business; until then 
I don't plan on discussing it.

I'd say this to anyone who asked your question, Doug, not just the white 
guys.  But you knew that had nothing to do with it.

Sunil

>From: heirdoug at netscape.net
>To: vision2020 at moscow.com, sunilramalingam at hotmail.com, sslund at adelphia.net
>Subject: When is it and when is it not my business?
>Date: Mon, 06 Nov 2006 18:39:26 -0500
>
>Carl wrote:
>"I'd personally call it no one else's business."
>
>And, Sunil wrote:
>"You've been on this for a couple of weeks now,
>and it's still not your business, not my business, and
>not the business of anyone on V2020 except Nick,
>and perhaps his friend, should she exist and should
>she be on this listserve."
>
>
>And, Saundra wrote:
>"As usual, Sunil & Carl are spot on, but for the rest
>of us, let heirdog's post serve as a reminder that
>Jealousy, the Green-Eyed Monster, really is incredibly
>ugly."
>
>
>I am very glad that you all are trying to define morality here on Blind 
>2020 but what standard shall we use to say what is and isn't some one 
>else's business? We all want to participate in the standard defining 
>exercise and we need to be all inclusive so that no one is left out.
>
>For the longest time I have been posting statements that some find 
>offensive and some find funny. It seems from this vast difference of 
>opinion that there is no moral standard by which we can judge one and 
>other's comments. Saundra calls me jealous and ugly. How does one make an 
>absolute statement such as thiat?
>
>I have read that some posters have "crossed the line" when it comes to 
>saying things. By what unwritten law or code of conduct do we judge where 
>the line is? And who is the policeman of "line crossing"? Is it J. Ford 
>with her online dictionary? Is it Wayne Fox and his multicolored Bible 
>Google? Or is it Keely Mix with her cutting wit and "I am innocent but you 
>are guilty" way of putting things.
>
>Tom-Tom says, by his posts and his blog, that it is OK to re-publish the 
>addresses of those he thinks are breaking a zoning code. Isn't what they do 
>in the privacy of their own home only "their business"? What gives him the 
>"right" to do this? Has he crossed the mystic "line"?
>
>What gives J. " :] " Ford the OK to publish false or misleading information 
>about a local developer, with the intent to do public harm to someone from 
>Christ Church? But when someone makes an embarrassing statement about an ex 
>husband who resides in the state pen, this has crossed the mystic "line"!
>
>Maybe it's time to shut this site down. Maybe it's time to do what someone, 
>I respect, said, ..."Live and let live". Is this the standard we should 
>follow?
>
>When Dale pointed out the incongruity of Keely's request, in light of all 
>of the accusations by Rose and Co. with respect to having people live in 
>their house, I thought I would bring up Nick Gier's living situation - 
>again. Is he paying any of the bills there? Wouldn't that make him a 
>"boarder" by the code? He is not a family member.
>
>It seems, by the comments back to me, that THIS is none of my business! 
>Why, he is an important public school figure with a lot on his plate (he 
>told us so)! Why one set of standards for some and not for others? Where is 
>the out cry "For the Love of the Code?"
>
>Is all of this a picture of "white men of privilege" being overcome and 
>subdued by those who feel down trodden? Or is it as Mrs. Lund said, "  a 
>reminder that Jealousy, the Green-Eyed Monster, really is incredibly 
>ugly..."?
>
>lemeno, Doug!
>
>
>
>
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