[Vision2020] 01-23-06 Daily Times-Call: Group examines religion's role in domestic violence

[Art Deco]

Publish Date: 1/23/2006 

Group examines religion's role in domestic violence


By Amanda Arthur 
The Daily Times-Call 

LONGMONT - Leaders of Longmont's faith community have paired up with the Longmont Ending Violence Initiative in hopes of putting a stop to domestic violence. 

A summit planned for February will focus partially on the topic of religion and how it relates to domestic violence.

The Rev. Rick Ebbers, who leads The Journey church in Longmont, said he wants to do whatever he can to end domestic abuse.

"A lot of us don't want to see it, but we need to be able to address it well, to give victims healing and a safe environment," he said.

Ebbers began to better understand the gravity of domestic violence when several abuse victims were referred to him after being given advice from their church leaders that Ebbers felt was wrong.

"Their church leaders would say, 'Pray about it, and God will intervene,' or worse yet, that the Bible calls them to submit to their husbands as they would submit to Christ," Ebbers said.

He said such advice is based on Bible verses taken out of context.

"That is an inappropriate response, and it's inappropriate from a biblical perspective," he said. "Christ calls us to submit from strength, not weakness."

By speaking with victims of domestic violence, Ebbers said, he's learned that abusers often align themselves with church leaders, thus leading their victims to think, "No one is going to believe me."

"As pastors, we love our churches and love our people and we don't want to see bad in people," Ebbers said. "We need to keep our eyes open."

He said those in the faith community and the community as a whole need to rally around victims of domestic violence to help them find a way out.

"(Domestic abuse) is not an environment God wants for you," Ebbers said.

Robin Ericson, who heads LEVI, said victims often use religion to encourage themselves to forgive their abusers, or that religious beliefs make them afraid to leave their abusers for fear of retribution from God.

"With older victims, she will not seek help unless her pastor assures her she will go to heaven if she leaves," Ericson said. "Our best hope is that her pastor understands the dynamics of domestic violence."

She said younger victims of domestic violence also often stay in abusive relationships because they agreed in their wedding vows to stay with their spouse "until death do us part."

"It's taken literally to mean 'whatever it takes,' despite the fact that they have black eyes or a broken arm," Ericson said.

LEVI hopes to educate the public about domestic violence, its signs and ways to help, she said.

The summit, which will take place Feb. 7 and 8, will feature a presentation by Lundy Bancroft, a family-issues specialist who works with domestic abusers.

Other sessions include discussion on the effects of domestic violence on children and domestic violence in teen relationships. A Feb. 8 presentation will focus on holding domestic abusers accountable.

"We are still called to love the perpetrators, but hold those perpetrators accountable," Ebbers said. "That doesn't mean we dismiss the abuse. It's about tough love."

Amanda Arthur can be reached at 303-684-5215, or by e-mail at aarthur at times-call.com.

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