[Vision2020] A hygienic and feminine rant

Art Deco deco at moscow.com
Fri Apr 15 20:21:47 PDT 2005


Phil will only support the bond if it includes a new Catheter for him.
  ----- Original Message ----- 
  From: Joan Opyr 
  To: Vision2020 Moscow 
  Sent: Friday, April 15, 2005 8:01 PM
  Subject: [Vision2020] A hygienic and feminine rant


  Keely wonders:

  "I truly don't know how much more clear I can be."

  Well, you could go to the Vet School and have them install one of those plastic windows in your belly, you know, like they put in the cows so the Vet students can see how their innards work?  If Phil could only get a good look at your colon, I'm sure that he'd . . . no, never mind.  That's way too much to ask of a school board member.  Just fax him an X-Ray of your appendix.  You do have an appendix, don't you?  If not, why not?  Was it bloated?  Grotesquely enlarged?  On the verge of bursting?  Did your appendix pretend to be one size but, with interest and inflammation, it was really much bigger?  Does Dale Courtney have a graph of your appendix?  Will Jack Wenders be discussing your internal (or do I mean infernal?) organs at next Friday's NSA disputatio?     

  "It pains me to wade into this again, but I will correct one thing in Phil's post.  I'm afraid his understanding is incorrect.

  The bond language, supported by a resolution at last month's board meeting, specifies that monies directed toward, for example, elementary remodels will be spent on those remodels.  The high school cost cannot and will not 'eat up' bond monies originally earmarked for WP and Russell.  This is ironclad 
  and stated clearly; it's not the way Phil has portrayed it."

  No, it's not.  The MODESS operandi of this levy is entirely different.  Fears that a security fence around the high school will put us OB (Over Budget) are misplaced.  (That's what happens, Phil, when you don't have the God-given equipment to understand the various applicators.)  Still, perhaps something is amiss here.  Perhaps something is OB -- I don't know; I can't quite put my finger on it.  Time to douche out the old ears?  No, it's still too cold.  Better wait for a warm SUMMER'S EVE.  My goodness, it would be dreadful if we were to all suffer TOXIC SHOCK SYNDROME come April 27th.  The patrons dining upon Moscow's public education system need to ask is this napkin sanitary?  We need to know, ALWAYS.

  Butt please don't think I'm picking on poor Phil.  I would never do such a thing.  As my grandfather said when he bought us matching cowboy hats, "I'm Tex, and this is my buddy, Co-Tex."  Heck, once he's SOAKED UP every last piece of information about this levy, is it CONCEIVABLE that Phil might just be persuaded to support it?

  I guess it DEPENDS.

  With vinegar and water in hand,
  Joan Opyr/Auntie Establishment   




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